HOW TO HANDLE NARCISSISTS AT WORK?
Narcissism can occasionally be prevented and controlled. But sometimes, especially in work environments, that isn’t the case. Working alongside a narcissist can be draining and stressful. It’s critical to set reasonable boundaries, have realistic expectations, and control your own reactions to the circumstance. No matter what, you don’t have to put up with their mistreatment.
A Narcissist: Who is it?
Narcissistic personality disorder is characterised by an inflated ego and lofty self-perceptions. They frequently manipulate people or circumstances to get what they want and tend to prioritise their own demands over those of others.
They are essential components of their identity, and when these requirements are not supplied, narcissists can collapse or experience depression. They often struggle in their interpersonal connections as a result. In the workplace, narcissism can be extremely harmful. These people frequently aspire to positions of leadership, and a narcissistic employer may come out as cruel, excessively demanding, and contemptuous of other workers.
We’ve all had challenging co-workers, and the majority of individuals can relate to occasionally clashing at work. However, narcissistic co-workers might present new difficulties, and it can be useful to recognize some characteristics. You can better prepare yourself and deal with challenges when they emerge by becoming aware of distinct patterns.
Here are some indicators of a narcissistic co-worker:
- Stealing Credit
- Avoiding responsibility for errors
- Demanding attention
- Talking about other people.
- Reacting poorly to criticism
- They have charm and conviction
- Interrupting and dominating conversations
- Even though they may appear to be immensely haughty, narcissists frequently experience deep loneliness and insecurity. They frequently exhibit envy at the smallest indication of another person’s success.
How to Handle a Narcissist at Work: 11 Tips
It goes without saying that getting along with co-workers is crucial, regardless of your position or sector. When working in meetings or on a variety of tasks, you will frequently need to work together. Having stated that, it’s imperative to develop narcissist coping mechanisms. Despite the fact that some dynamics can be annoying, you can learn to cope better.
Here are 10 suggestions for handling a narcissistic co-worker:
Understand how gaslighting functions
Gaslighting is a type of psychological abuse when the victim is made to doubt their perception of reality. Techniques for gaslighting can include force, manipulation, scapegoating, and wilful lying. When you feel perplexed or even blindsided by a co-worker’s behaviour, learning more about narcissistic gaslighting might be useful.
Try not to take things personally.
The personality and expectations of your co-worker, not you, are what constitute narcissism. You might, regrettably, find yourself in the line of fire. Remind yourself that it’s not your fault even if that is the case. Furthermore, personalizing situations only fuels resentment, frustration, and self-blame.
Uphold Reasonable Expectations
It’s normal to desire that your co-worker would accept responsibility for their actions or would have greater empathy for others. But maintaining unattainable standards could lead to even more animosity. Try to concentrate on accepting your co-worker for who they are instead. That does not obligate you to approve of or support the action. Acceptance is simply recognising reality for what it is.
Document Abusive Conduct
Unfortunately, narcissists frequently get away with harmful or immoral behaviour because they may do exceptionally well at work. To advance, they frequently tread over others. As a result, whenever you see any suspicious conduct, note it. Even if you don’t intend to act right away, having that proof could be very helpful if a more significant problem occurs.
Define Clear Boundaries
Setting appropriate workplace boundaries is crucial. These restrictions may be physical, psychological, or emotional. Knowing your healthy boundaries and reminding yourself of them is crucial for your wellbeing. If your co-worker can’t treat you with respect, other steps need to be made.
Narcissists are frequently drawn to weaker personalities. They do this because they want to be surrounded by supportive individuals. As a result, it’s crucial to maintain your confidence and commitment to your principles. The narcissist is better disarmed and has less control over your well-being the more you speak up for yourself.
Speak with your manager
It’s wise to discuss your worries with your manager if problems persist or if tension increases. When stating observable difficulties, try to remain neutral and consider noting any specific events. Don’t criticize your teammate; instead, emphasise the problems (rather than the personality).
Refrain from gossiping
Generally speaking, it’s never a good idea to disparage or gossip about your co-workers. But if you believe you work with a narcissistic co-worker, this guideline is very important. You could be attacked by anything you say. Additionally, they tend to change even kind words into ones that support their version of reality.
Be Wary of Love Bombing or Flattery
Narcissists could be drawn to particular people they see as exceptional or superior. If this occurs to you, they may project their idealized fantasies onto you and show you endless amounts of affection. This may appear to be highly rewarding at first. However, it’s crucial to proceed with caution because this could end up into love bombing. They will eventually realize that you are only a person, and that will inevitably disappoint them, which can cause them to become really angry.
Don’t Share Personal Information
Keep it simple and business-like when at work. For their own emotional or material benefit, narcissists may attempt to make friends with others. This way of thinking may be most prevalent in the workplace. Try to avoid disclosing information about your family, friends, or personal interests. Additionally, confirm that your social media privacy settings are on (narcissism aside, this is acceptable behaviour in practically any workplace setting!).
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